Right Back At You
by sweetysmart0505
Summary: Sam would forever resent the fact that he was the reason his family was shattered, broken. He would always fight for them, though. But with Dean's watchful eye, how far will his brother let him get? And what will Sam do to save Dean?


OneShot!

Summary - Sam would forever resent the fact that he was the reason his family was shattered, broken. He would always fight for them, though. But with Dean's watchful eye, how far will his brother let him get? And what will Sam do to save Dean?

This, and the title, is a follow-up of my previous OneShot, What I wouldn't Do For You. It's Dean's thoughts about Sam and so on. I would be happy if you read that one as well. Thank-you to everyone who did.

Thanks Jude, for your awesome Beta work. Seriously, wonderful job and couldn't have done it without you.

Disclaimer - Same old, same old. I own nothing.

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**Right Back At You**

"Take your brother outside as fast as you can! Don't look back! Now, Dean, go!"

Though he had been too young to remember the fire itself, Sam had always thought it was his fault. After all, it happened in his nursery. The demon was coming for him that night. Sam always wished he knew why. Why him? Why was he the one kid the Yellow-Eyed Demon took so much interest in? Why did Sam have to have the powers that have haunted him ever since Jess had died?

He always wondered what it would have been like if the demon had not come, if the fire had not have happened.

But he knew that it was all in the past. All he could do was move forward. But of course how much further could he really go?

Dean had sold his soul to bring him back. How did Dean think that made him feel?

But Sam knew Dean. Sam knew how Dean was. Dean had always stuck up for Sam, whenever he needed help... of any kind, whether it was a spirit, a bully, or even a girl... Though he would never actually admit he needed help with them. Dean was always there to help him.

Sometimes, it just drilled on Sam's nerves. But most of the time he was thankful.

But Dean didn't realize how much Sam would do for him. Just like Dean, he would gladly give up his life for his brother. That's what family is for right?

Sam sometimes wished he could remember what had happened on the night of the fire. But whenever up the subject Dean would say, "No, you don't Sammy." And Sam would go on, knowing that something awful happened that night. Sometimes he even felt as if Dean blamed him.

Hell, Sam blamed himself. He knew that it happened in his nursery. He now knew that it was him the demon had been after. He also knew why, so of course he blamed himself, although Dean always reassured him that it wasn't his fault.

Sam loved his brother, of course. He always would, but he sometimes hated him as well. How could he make that deal? It wasn't fair. All of this shouldn't be on Dean's shoulders. There were two of them after all. They were a great team. And there just wasn't an 'I' in team no matter how hard you look.

But Dean didn't seem to realize that. He was too busy taking care of 'his Sammy' to notice Sam and _his_ feelings.

Sam had felt that Dean had once been angry with him long ago. He had no actually memory of it, but when Sam had tried to bring up certain memories a look would cross Dean's face and he would quickly change the subject.

Sam knew that particular look. He had memorized every look Dean had. He recognized the subtle look of anger, but he never got the nerve to push the subject. The past was a touchy subject to every Winchester.

But Sam did remember one conversation with Dean when they were young. Sam couldn't have been older than 5.

****

XOXOXOXOX

Little Sam had been sitting on his bed watching a brand new episode of the Care Bears. "Dean, where's Dad?"

It was a simple and standard question that was brought up every time John left the house. "He's out."

This answer usually satisfied the youngest Winchester, but he seemed to be getting wiser. He shifted his position on the bed. "Out where?"

Dean looked up from his math homework, dropping his pencil on his book in a frustrated manner. "Out with Bobby."

Sam turned down the volume on the television to more clearly hear his brother, and Dean took this as a sign of another long pointless argument.

"Why won't you ever tell me?"

Dean sighed, and stretched out on the floor to lay more comfortably on his stomach. "He's out looking at towns." He ran his fingers through his blond hair. Even at 9 years old, Dean had picked up alot of habits from his father already.

Sam walked over to Dean and sat cross-legged right in front of him. "Why do we always have to move?"

"Because Dad says so."

"Why?"

"Sam, quit it."

"But Dean... why can't we just stay in a house, and stay in one spot forever?" Dean's face lost its colour and even at a young age, Sam knew something was wrong. "Dean?"

Then Dean just burst. "Sam! Stop it! We have to keep moving, OK? We have to. We don't have a home. It's gone! Don't you understand? ... We don't have a home." The last sentence was barely above a whisper, and then silence.

Even though Dean's face had been turned away the entire time, Sam knew the anger was directed at him. Sam could feel Dean's anger finally leaving. But at Sam's young age and his lack of knowledge of the past, he still didn't understand _why_ Dean was mad at him. Tears started to well up in his eyes. Dean didn't even look up, as Sam jumped up and stormed out of the room.

Dean had kept his eyes diverted from Sam the whole time, and didn't even follow when he had left. He was thinking of past events and he wished it had never happened. He wished they did still have a home, and they could all have a normal life, but it just wasn't going to happen.

After a few moments though, Dean was brought back to the present as he heard his homework paper crinkle beneath his arms. He sighed deeply.

Sam's body had been racked with uncontrollable sobs. He was angry and confused, hating to think that Dean didn't love him. He had nowhere else to go. Sam curled up on the far side of the couch and grabbed the nearest pillow to hug. Dean had yelled at him, and he wasn't sure why. Sam began to think that maybe his brother didn't love him anymore.

But then he had heard soft footsteps coming down the stairs from the bedroom. Sam curled up tighter in a ball. A hand was placed gently on his shoulder, and he felt Dean sit down beside him. Sam could sense through thst touch that his older brother felt totally responsible and completely sorry.

****

XOXOXOXOX

That little outburst so many years ago had alerted Sam to the possibility that he was somehow involved with why they had moved around so much. He never said anything about it again, but he was curious. But he now realized he never really had wanted to know.

He wished he could just forget the whole incident and chalk it up to a lifetime of unfortunate events. But it wasn't going to happen, so Sam was stuck with the painful memories that would only haunt him more and more as time passed. It really is a lie when people say time heals all wounds. Some wounds are too deep to be healed.

But Sam always had Dean. Dean was his shoulder to cry on whenever he needed it, whether he actually did or not. Dean was the only person in the entire world who had stuck with him through every little incident and whom he trusted with his very life.

That didn't mean that Sam wasn't still angry. He would try ...No he would succeed in getting Dean out of his deal. He couldn't lose his brother after all they had been through. He just couldn't, not now, not ever. Their dad had left them, and it felt like hell. He couldn't lose the last person on the face of the earth that he still has. Whether Dean knew it or not, Sam couldn't survive without his brother.

Sam was starting to think of what a little kid he really was. He depended completely on his brother, and now Dean was going to die and Sam didn't know if he could really deal with it. He was so in need of someone to look after him. He needed the companionship. He needed Dean.

So yes he was pissed, but he would stop at nothing to save Dean. One way or another, Sam would stop that deal. Even if it cost him his own life.

Of course, Sam would never tell Dean that. Sam knew Dean wasn't kidding when he said he would stop Sam if he even tried to break the deal because both brothers knew what would happen. He never doubted that Dean would tie him to a chair if he had to.

But it didn't mean that Sam wasn't going to try. He would give up his own life to do so.

Sam now knew his destiny; he knew it was inevitable. He was already destined to die, but Dean didn't have to. Dean's life was alot more valuable in Sam's eyes. Sam would only bring more harm then good in the future. And who's not to say that Sam might go dark side the moment Dean is gone.

There was really no way of knowing, so he just had to save Dean. That was a simple fact. Dean was going to live, so help him God.

And if he failed Sam knew the next move.

He would be joining his brother soon after...

The End

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I honestly don't think this one is as good as my Dean OneShot. I write better for Dean than Sam. But I hope it wasn't terrible. Please review. Feel free to flame as long as it is constructive. 

Thanks all!


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